The Miracle in Obedience

Artists can be very proud of their work that any criticism is often met with resistance. In my earlier days doing communications work, I considered edits on style as an assault and a misunderstanding of my creative process. I would sulk and defend myself in aggression and lose faith in whoever wielded the red pen. I had more faith in my fellow student publication writers because they were writers, not non-writing superiors. But all along, it hadn’t been my creative process and effort that got wounded. It was all about my ego.

This is my latest realization especially after experiencing a major overhaul in the pieces I submitted in a recent project.  Requests for revision are not new to me and I welcome the scrimmage as organizations have their preferred tones; but really, I had welcomed these because I only had to revise parts. In the case of this local project, it’s my first time to be asked to rewrite from beginning to end and I was very surprised.

I was very surprised not because of the major rewriting, but because of how I accepted the daunting task with no question, no assault, no aggression, no devaluation of my worth.  A lot of work, but not a tinge of hurt.

If this happened to my younger, blindly arrogant self, I would have moped coldly through the whole task. Then I would have remained super arrogant, with my proclamation louder than my already stunted talent.

The peace I felt while rewriting and running on borrowed time was a gift.  He has filled me up so much that I get my worth from His love alone, and not from affirmation and accomplishment – not anymore. So this is what it means to turn to God and be a Christian gale^ — little by little you pay no attention to ego; you peacefully accept and do everything with and out of love.  It’s not always like this, of course, because there are days when the ego gets so stubborn, but at least now I know that I can always cry out to Him whenever it does (That’s why prayer must be taken seriously. Like how Doctora Lara would echo Father Ignacio Larranaga and Saint Ignatius’ Examen, among others – prayer, and auto-critic, side by side.).

And by embracing the daunting revision, I learned from my client (and former Advertising professor) something so new and helpful that with further practice can enhance my skills in writing for the ear. Another case of me being delightfully bobo, and I will forever thank RGH for his mentorship. It has been a great writing exercise with a pro! J

True enough, there is always a miracle in obedience.

Purpose versus Pleasure

Though not general, here’s a typical journey towards knowing one’s purpose.

In school, you spend your days in a laboratory, a sampling of the world where mistakes are encouraged and are not as costly. This is where you learn statements like “God is love,” “Jesus saves,” but never quite grasp what they really mean.  As soon as you graduate, you excitedly venture into the world of work, and live and decide independently. You feel all grownup by earning your keep, and enjoying it, too.  But as you pour all your energy and resources on pleasure, you wonder why you still come home to an empty, lonely house. You ask, what do I live for?

An apologist once said that one loses out on his purpose, and therefore becomes the saddest person on earth, if he enjoys pleasure without limit. Always, this happens if prayer, if relationship with God is sidetracked.  So one may take on crucial life decisions – like marriage or state of life, acquisition, etc. – but still with muddled intentions.

In one of Brother Bo’s old talks, he shares that to ensure peace and happiness, we must make decisions out of purpose, and not out of pleasure. For example, buying a car so our children can conveniently go to school is a decision made out of purpose; deliberately buying a car that’s better than the neighbor’s is a decision made out of pleasure.

How do we know that it is out of good purpose? Well, we are all creatures of love, and decisions made of out of good purpose are decisions made out of love. Our purpose is to love in whatever form it may be.